So, I’m in Montreal with Shaun, he’s just completed the PWA Friends For Life Bike Rally, and I’m off to have brunch with my mom. I thought a daytime meal out on a patio in the sunshine would help lend some levity to the situation. Of course, I met her at her’s and we walked down to a little brunch spot around the corner.
We chatted and laughed and when we got about half way through the meal (I didn’t want to save it for the end because if things went poorly I didn’t want to end on that note) when I said,
Me: “So have you been on the PROUD website lately?” (knowing full well that a link to the OUTLOOKS article that outs me as a porn star appears on my show page.
Mom: “Yesterday.”
Of course that doesn’t mean she saw or even read the article, she could just have been listening to the station online.
Me: “Have you seen the article on me and Shaun in OUTLOOKS?”
Mom: “No. What’s that?”
Shit. I thought if at least she had read the large print in the article she would already know and this would just be a formality.
Me: “Oh, well, it’s this great article in a nationwide magazine talking about me and Shaun and the radio and our pasts…”
I take a gulp of coffee
Me: “…and what makes us interesting as a couple.”
Mom: “That’s nice I’d love to read it!”
Me: “Ya. It’s a great article.” I had hit a dead end so I tried another tactic. “Oh, and I pitched a reality show idea to OUTtv and they loved it. We start filming this fall!”
Mom: “What? You never told me about a reality show! What’s it about?”
Here we are ladies and gentlemen, this is it, there was no going back now!
Me: “Well, it’s a reality show where contestants compete to become the next big porn star… and I’m the host.”
I paused here, hoping somehow the pieces would come together by themselves. They didn’t… It’s easier in my family when the pieces DO come together by themselves because we just don’t talk about things like this. We just don’t.
Mom: “Because of the radio, you’re going to host?”
I took a deep breath and said
Me: “No, because when I was in L.A. I became a pretty well known name as an adult performer.”
Image by: Keith Haring
There was a moment when I wasn’t sure she had heard, or understood. It was only a second or two, but it felt like forever. Her face did not change, but there was something in her eye that said ‘So, that’s what was going on in L.A., so many questions answered.’
I wasn’t ready for what she asked next, although it’s all I ever needed to hear.
Mom: “When do you start filming?”
